Two Broken Hearts
by xMyLonelyAngelx
Summary: This is a story continuing on from the end of “Journey’s End” in Series 4. The broken & lonely hearts of the last Timelord, the aching heart of the Biological Disaster and a scarred fragile human heart…can they be healed? Or is it really the journey’s end
1. Summary & AN

Summary:

**Summary:  
****This is a story continuing on from the end of "Journey's End" in Series 4.**

**The broken & lonely hearts of the last Timelord, the aching heart of the Biological Disaster and a scarred fragile human heart…can they be healed? Or is it really the journey's end?**

_**This is my first Doctor Who FanFic! Hope you'll enjoy it. And please leave any comment or criticism so I can make this and my other stories better! **_xD

_**On with the Story! **_


	2. Emotionless

Continuing on from "Journey's End" in Series 4 of Doctor Who

**Continuing on from "Journey's End" in Series 4 of ****Doctor Who**

The Doctor's heart was breaking as he repeated the words that Rose never had a chance to hear the last time he left her here. "I said… 'Rose Tyler…'" He looked at the Human Doctor, gesturing for him to complete the sentence that would without a doubt break the Doctor's hearts if it were said by someone else, he reminded himself that he is him, just half human.

The Human Doctor bent down and whispered the remaining word into Rose's ear. The doctor was about to turned his back and walked into the Tardis with Donna as Rose grabbed the collar of the Human Doctor's suit and brought him close for a kiss. The Human Doctor hadn't expected this, but as he was enjoying the moment, too soon did Rose pull away.

The sound of the Tardis brought tears to Rose's eyes, as she realized The Doctor was leaving her again…even if she had another version of him, it still wasn't the man she loved and whom showed her the universe.

The Human Doctor frowned and concentrated on Rose's tear stricken face, but couldn't help but wonder how the Doctor would feel at this moment. Surely it broke his heart to just leave his beloved Rose here with someone else. What was worse… the Doctor had two hearts; it would hurt twice as much if not more.

For the first time since his creation the Human Doctor felt sorry for his Timelord self. The Doctor couldn't spend his life with the one he loved; he couldn't die with her…only watch her age and waste away. But he would hopefully know the Human Doctor would and could never replace him in Rose's heart… no matter how much they looked, acted, sounded and loved her the same.

Rose just stood there frozen and crying, she had forgotten about the people beside her. She didn't care about them; she just had to accept the fact that _he_ left her _again_ for the third time… what hurt her more was that he expected her to spend the rest of her life loving someone else.

She just couldn't do that, because she knew every time she would look at the Human Doctor, painful memories would resurface and break her fragile heart again and again and again. She wanted to chase after _him_ knowing that nothing would change. He would just leave her again, because he couldn't watch her die. 'The curse of the Timelords' as he called it.

Jackie made herself known when she called out to Rose and held her, soothing her as only a mother can. Rose cried into her shoulder, she was about to collapse when the Human Doctor caught her. She moved away from him and leaned on her mother for support. The Human Doctor was hurt but some how understood and accepted the fact that Rose might not love him the way he loves her, she might never look at him again.

A limo drove up to the side of the beach and Pete stood out holding Jackie and his beloved son.

He saw the Human Doctor and gasped. "Doctor? Is it really you?" The Human Doctor turned towards Pete and shook his head slightly while smiling a sad smile and gesturing the near collapsing Jackie who was holding her daughter's weight. Pete rushed towards the pair and gently pulled Rose off Jackie while handing the sleeping Tony to his mother.

He carried Rose towards the limo and told the others to get in, but still full of questions for the man who looks like the Doctor and relief that Jackie and Rose are now safe in the car.

The ride to the Tyler mansion was comfortably quite, the slow breathing of the little Tony, the Human Doctor in thought, Jackie worrying about her daughter, Pete worried about his family and an unmoving Rose staring out the window. None of them had smiles on their faces but they weren't faces of pain and sorrow…mainly worry and/or emotionless.

Tonight will be a quiet and thoughtful night, not painful… for many.


	3. Alone

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas! Without him this story wouldn't make sense!**

After the Doctor made sure Donna was safe at home, he went back to his Tardis not knowing where to go. He stood by the Tardis controls staring at nothing, he walked away and sat on a chair still staring at nothing and seeing nothing. His mind wondered back to what Davros said about him and his "weapons" and the people that died for him. The Doctor remembered each one of them but lingered on his latest companions for a while, he was alone…again.

_Last of the Timelords…_

_Alone again…_

_Always alone…_

_Loneliness eating at his hearts…_

It was as if someone was whispering those words to him, the words were right…loneliness _was_ eating at his heart. Speaking of his heart, Rose and his Human self popped into his mind for the hundredth time since he left them at Bad Wolf Bay in the parallel world. Donna, Martha and _Rose_ were hurt by him; he created most of their pain & sadness and took away what made them feel better, whole…he took the most from Rose.

Donna was happy and became a better person because of him, but he took it away in the end…

Martha had loved him, he pretended to not notice until she left him…

Rose matured after meeting him; he saved her life many times and was repaid with her love. He left her, not just once but three times. She refused to let go of him and searched for him, but he left her…no, _abandoned _her in another world with another version of himself in her care…

Technically, _they_ left _him_, but he caused or forced them to leave. Not because he wanted to, but because it was _better_ for them…or so he thought. Rose, Martha and Donna deserve to be happy and the Doctor feels guilty for taking away something or someone they loved…

The Doctor wanted Rose to be happy when he left the Human Doctor with her; he hopes she learns to love him as much as she seems to love the Timelord. Although it broke his hearts, he wants Rose to have a better life. The Human Doctor can give her so much more then the Doctor can ever dream of. They can grow old together, have children and die together…

It was also selfish…the Doctor couldn't bear to see Rose die one day, so he left her and once again without a final 'goodbye'…

There was sudden knocking on the Tardis doors followed by a familiar voice; "Dad! Open up! DAD!" the Doctor got up looking at the Tardis consoles and frowning in confusion. "What?" he mumbled to him self. "DAD! It's me! Jenny!" there's the familiar voice again. The Doctor was really confused now, could it really be Jenny? His daughter? But she's dead, she died in his arms…or did she?

The Doctor remembers her taking the bullet for him. It seemed like only yesterday as the memory washed over him. Curiosity was eating at him as he walked to and opened the Tardis doors. Sure enough a young girl that had the same height and looks as Jenny walked in and pull him into a bear hug which left the Doctor gasping for breath. "Oh dad! I missed you so much!" the Doctor's jaw dropped with wide eyes – either from shock or because he couldn't breathe, it really was Jenny…But all he could say was "What?"

"Dad! Are you okay? You look kind of pale!" Jenny started to panic, what if he doesn't want her to travel with him? She was still panicking when the Doctor whispered and voice gradually growing stronger and louder, "it's you! It really is you! But how can that be? I thought you died! You took the bullet for me! But you should have known I would regenerate…_WAIT! WHAT?_ Aren't you dead? What happened? And _how _did you get here? Speaking of which where are we?" the Doctor stopped to catch his breath and realized Jenny still had him in a bear hug, so that's why he had to stop and breath so soon.

Jenny grinned and spoke up finally releasing the Doctor from her grasp, "We are on Earth dad! In Cardiff…or something like that." The Doctor started to look normal now since he could breathe properly. Jenny continued "after you left Messaline I woke up and got into a space pod and came to find you, because you said we could travel anywhere…that's if you still want me to come with you." Jenny was now staring at her feet and looking embarrassed.

The Doctor was silent and trying to take in this information when he suddenly spoke up, startling Jenny. "Of course you can come! But how did you wake up? Is it because you are…" he struggled to find the right words "…my _daughter _so you can regenerate and heal? But then you couldn't have regenerated because you don't look any different…or can't you regenerate? Only heal!" the Doctor was still mumbling to himself but Jenny noticed something missing, "Dad?" "…Is it because you are not born but created in a machine?…" "DAD!" Jenny yelled, snapping the Doctor out of his thinking-out-loud.

"Huh?" the Doctor looked at a confused Jenny, "Where's Donna?" the Doctor looked grim and replied in a quiet and pained voice "She's gone" Jenny was frantic "What? Gone where? How can she be gone? What do you mean dad? I heard songs about her across the planets when I traveled, she saved the universe! How can she be _gone_." The Doctor was now holding her shoulders and staring into her eyes. "She's at home, safe. You have nothing to worry about." "Why is she at home? Didn't she want to travel anymore?" the Doctor dropped his hand from Jenny's shoulder and turned away, "She wanted to…but she can't. I had to wipe away any memory of the time we spent together. She became Half Timelord and her human brain couldn't take all the information that was being feed to her by the Timelord part…she was dying, so I had to take away her memories."

By now Jenny had tears in her eyes, the Doctor still had his back turned towards his daughter but she hugged him again, as if she could feel the pain and sorrow he has been trying to keep control of and for once he didn't try to hide it.

**Once again! thank you thingthingthingda1!**


	4. Better

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas! **

Rose woke up with a groggy feeling and a headache, she was confused at first but then all the memories came rushing back to her.

Her mum Jackie had fallen asleep in the car with a snoring Tony in her arms, when they reached the Tyler Mansion it was pouring and Pete valiantly carried his sleeping wife into the glorious white house. The Human Doctor walked in after and held open the door for a still emotionless Rose, but the look in her eyes made the Human Doctor subconsciously reach out and steady her.

When they were inside with Jackie in bed and the toddler under the covers, Pete, Rose and the Human Doctor sat in the living room and talked. Pete asked about Mickey while failing to hide his curiosity over the Human Doctor's presence. The Human Doctor was looking around the large living space and marveling over the grand piano which stood in the corner by the window when Pete finally asked; "So why are you here Doctor?" The Human Doctor opened his mouth as Rose spoke in a quite voice "_He_'s not the Doctor… well…not really."

The Human Doctor was hurt, but expected nothing more then this, he established the fact that it will take time for Rose to accept him. He looked at his hands as he explain the course of his creation and their journey to Pete, sometimes stealing glances at Rose to see her reaction but she kept a poker face. "…and so here I am…" ended the Human Doctor's rather complicated explanation which left Pete slightly dazed.

"What about your identity?" asked Pete who carefully avoided saying 'Doctor' just incase it upsets his daughter. Rose, who had been sitting there quietly sipping her hot tea suggested "What about John Smith?" the Human Doctor thought about it and smiled, "Yes, that would be perfect!" Rose smiled with the Human Doctor for the first time since the Doctor left her, roughly 3 hours ago. The Human Doctor was stunned and smiled wider, this time directed at his darling Rose, she couldn't resist the Doctor's smile –even on his clone- so she just smiled wider in response.

"Job?" Pete added, "definitely a doctor." Replied John Smith still with a smile plastered on his face. "But where would you get the paper work? We all know you're knowledge is wider then any human but you'll still need to pass exams to get a qualification." Rose stated matter-of-factly. John's smile grew into a smirk; "your right Rose, but I have got this" while reaching into his whole arm into his jacket pocket and pulling out a black leather pocket. Rose gasped "Physic paper!" while Pete was looking between the John and Rose in confusion.

"But you can't always use that, it doesn't work on genius remember? And they are bound to need photocopies!" exclaimed Rose. "Well we'll see won't we?" it was as if John something she didn't, he was too confident. Pete coughed to get their attention, "Okay, I'm going to let you two sort that out but where are you going to live?" Rose's answer stunned Pete, John and herself. She didn't know why she said he could live with her but she did and thought it would be more convenient for them all, since John and the Doctor both still seem scared of her mother and didn't want to get slapped again.

"O-okay?" John stuttered while his eyes were huge from shock. "Uh…sure?" Pete seemed the same and both answers came out as questions incase Rose didn't want this and wanted to take it back. Inside they were both happy, John because she is starting to accept him, Pete because after all the Doctor put Rose through she still seemed to care for him…well, a human version of him.

"Y-aah" Rose tried to sound sure and strong which made John look at her, his eyes seem to say _you don't have to do this, I'll understand if you aren't comfortable_ but Rose looked back with her own message _I am sure, but you don't have to if you don't want to_. John was smiling again, this time not just for Rose but he was actually really happy! Rose is starting to finally accept him and to him, it was the best news in the world.

Pete and John talked some more and tried to make sense of the fact that John is half Timelord, Pete keeps thinking of him as the real Doctor but was lucky to find that Rose fell into a deep slumber on the couch nearly dropping her cup, John saw this and carried her into her room in the mansion. After John tucked into the covers he stood only to stare at Rose's peaceful expression as she slept, he soon left with another glance before he closed the door.

Now Rose got up and went to the bathroom when she realized she was still in the clothes she wore yesterday she frowned and straightened her top then looked around for a change of clothes and towel so she could have a shower. Then she spotted a picture. It was a picture of her and the Doctor when they came to visit her mum. She smiled at the memory and the look on the Doctor's face as her mum was about to slap him again. She got the things she needed and headed in the shower.

John was looking at the piece of Tardis that the Doctor had given to him before they headed for Bad Wolf Bay the day before. He had told him one day he could grow his own Tardis and travel in time and space. But John knew that would be hard because the piece of the Tardis is not growing fast enough and need the breath of a Timelord to develop, that would take at least 10 years of his life. He was only half Timelord so it would be taking 20 years of his life, although he did it once…no the Doctor did it before but he could regenerate and heal. John couldn't so if he gave away twenty years he would never regain it.

He pondered this while still lying in the guest room bed and was interrupted by knocking on the door. "Come in." Rose came in dressed in jeans and a blue top holding a large package in her hands, when she saw John still in bed in his T-Shirt and his pin stripe pants she blushed for no apparent reason.

"Um…you got mail." John sat up startled and quickly pocketed the piece of Tardis. "Okay? This is weird, who would be sending mail to me?" Rose looked up with a stunned expression and said "it's…it's from the…the Doctor…" she whispered the last part so John could hardly hear her.

**Please review! And if you want a turn in the story then please don't hesitate in telling me! xD**


	5. Parallel World Letter Boxes

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas! **

After the Doctor filled Jenny on the events that had happened since they last met; it was his turn to ask questions.

"So how did you get here?" the Doctor sat on the couch with Jenny. "Well…you see…" the Doctor was kind of shocked, why was she reluctant to tell him and seems so embarrassed? "Go on." He urged. "I kind of…crashed into the Santaran ship…" the Doctor kept quiet to allow Jenny to continue.

"Um…I woke up in the infirmary and you were gone, they told me that you left because I was shot and should have died. So I took some gear and went to the spare space pod to go and find you." Now the Doctor felt guilty for not knowing Jenny was going to wake up, he felt guilty for leaving her…even if she was dead.

Jenny continued while fiddling with her fingers and looking down, "the Space pod crashed into the Santaran ship by accident when it wasn't picked up on the radar. So I got out before it exploded and transferred the emergency teleport into my wrist watch and pushed the pod into the sea so no one would know I was there."

The Doctor was wondering how she got here and the fact that she was able to follow the Tardis and know how to transfer teleports when he suddenly realized; Jenny may have his knowledge and can trace him, but it seems she doesn't have his memories; which is good, she might be traumatized after seeing or experiencing what he witnessed or did.

"Where did you go? That was a long time ago…I didn't think the space pod could travel in time…" the Doctor hid his emotions once again. "I created a time traveling device but only had power for one trip so I went back to the year that you picked up Donna from earth. Anyway, the teleport was a bit broken so I teleported and landed in Cardiff but in a parallel world, so I thought I must have gone through the rift."

The Doctor now thought of Rose, "That must have been before I dropped Rose and _him_ at Bad Wolf Bay in parallel Norway or...no…unless…it's a bit too early for Rose to have already open the rift big enough to have someone fall through it, so someone must have opened a gap between the worlds…but why and…_how_?" More talking to himself, but Jenny heard and quickly changed the subject before her dad would feel pain from remembering Rose, although he might feel pained all the time she could at least try not to make it worse.

"After that I fainted and woke up in a hospital room. Then this tall guy in a long coat came to me there. He said he was from Torchwood" Jenny was shocked to see the Doctor jump up at this, "What? Did they do anything to you?" he was gripping Jenny's shoulders. "Dad, calm down. They didn't do anything, apart from asking me questions about time travel and where I came from. That guy that seemed to be the leader…he said his name was Captain Jack Harkness." the Doctor's eyes widen with confusion and shock. "They were asking who I was and I said I was your daughter. I asked them if they could tell me where you were since they seemed like they knew you. They then sent me through the Rift with a genetic code tracer to find you and then I ended up here. It took me a little while but then I managed to find you and here I am." She began to feel a bit light-headed.

Jenny fell backwards and was lucky that the Doctor caught her. "Are you alright?" She seemed a bit confused "Yeah, I'm great…just a bit dizzy after going through the Rift."

The Doctor was worried; it must have been a lot to take in after going through the Rift, but he knew Jenny was strong and would eventually be alright after she rested.

The Doctor fiddled with the Tardis controls while Jenny was resting in her new bedroom. He was still worried about Jenny but now more focused on closing the Rift as memories flooded back to him; Rose, Jack and Mickey-the-idiot saving Earth from being ripped apart by a nuclear-rift energy explosion so a Slitheen could escape from loneliness and death. Although it hurt, it was good to remember his old friends.

There was time to spare after the Rift was closed…again. He got out a pen, paper and an envelope with a stamp from Midnight on it (from his and Donna's trip) and began to write. It took him a while as he was thinking about the things he should say, to Rose and to his human self – who he assumed will be called John Smith on Earth. When he was done, he popped something in with the letter then licked the flap on the envelope, ready to send it.

You would think, with all the technology in the universe there would be one where you can send letters to parallel worlds but, no. There was even a butter stick (butter in a glue stick holder thingy) but of course no parallel-letter boxes. So the Doctor searched for a little gap in the void to post it through as maybe a final present, he was in luck. There was just a big enough hole that could fit a envelope.

Only problem was…after he sent the letter, he would have to close it, there may be no chance of seeing them again but the Doctor knew it must be down (even if it will open in a few decades time).

**Sorry for the short chapter but I'm starting a new FanFic called:**

**Well I don't know just yet, but it will be Twilight-Doctor Who and it's set after Edward left Bella in Newmoon and before the Wire in series 2.**

**Please review!!! **


	6. The letter &Happy memories

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas**** and editing the raw chapters****.**

_Last time:_

"_Um…you got mail." John sat up startled and quickly pocketed the piece of Tardis. "Okay? This is weird, who would be sending mail to me?" Rose looked up with a stunned expression and said "it's…it's from the…the Doctor…" she whispered the last part so John could hardly hear her._

**Chapter:**

"Okay…so a letter…from the Doctor…how does that work again?" John was confused and shocked… again, how did he send a letter to them? "I…I don't know?" Rose stuttered again "Something to do with the Rift, maybe?" "Hmm…Rose Tyler you are a genius! But I would personally invent a parallel world letter box if I had the time…" she just smiled sadly; remembering the times the Doctor said she was a genius. Rose went to sit on the bed as John moved so he was sitting on the edge and took the package from the still stunned genius.

John opened the letter and they both read the contents before looking at the other things that came in the package;

_Dear Rose and Me (well, not really me, only a human version of me, kind of is me… but still you get the point),_

_I am now travelling with my daughter Jenny and all is well, by chance I saw a little gap in the rift thingy and thought I should send you both a letter and some documents. I have enclosed a birth certificate, graduate paper, degree paper, and any other form of identification you both may need in your complicated human life style. I assumed you (when I say you I actually mean me and that me is the human me) will use the name John Smith and so it is on all your documents._

_I sincerely hope you both have a wonderful life and I would like to apologize… for everything bad I have caused or could not prevent in your lives._

_I hope you both will forgive me one day, and to conclude this letter; I'm sorry, so very sorry._

_Love from the Doctor_

_PS: I never wrote a letter to humans before and I think PS should be correct to use… the stamp on the package which I have sent you is from the planet Midnight, hopefully you both will remember and please do not show it to anyone (not that you will but be careful someone might see it)._

John opened the rest of the package as Rose reread the letter again and again; in the package were a pile of documents and certificates from his 'first day of school' to 'bowling competitions' so there were obviously a lot of documents.

But what John say next made his eyes grow as wide as a plum; it was a little black box, and in it held a ring; a ring made from white gold with a rose made of diamond which sat on the centre of the band and 5 red little jewels surrounding it. It was truly magnificent and John knew what he wanted to do and what the Doctor would want him to do; to ask Rose Tyler for her hand in marriage. He didn't know many rules that humans had to follow apart from; no killing people, no hurting people, things about the laws, the declaration of human rights…he wondered if he or the Doctor had the first copy now…and to ask a father for permission and blessing on marrying his daughter.

He put the ring into the pocket that also held the piece of Tardis quickly so Rose wouldn't see it. When rose went out, he got dressed in the pin-stripe suit from yesterday and walked down to talk to Pete, but Rose got to him first and told her dad she was going to take John to the mall for new clothes and other things he may need.

John didn't object like the Doctor would have done, he blamed and thanked Donna at the same time. Rose was also surprised that he didn't seem to mind shopping on earth now, but it was a change she liked.

_A few months later…_

John and Rose's relationship had been getting stronger and better by the second, he still didn't tell her about the ring or the piece of Tardis yet but he had asked Pete for permission to marry Rose, Pete gave them his blessing and that's why John had set up this romantic dinner; in a Italian restaurant by the harbour to pop the big question.

When John led Rose to their table, Rose was surprised and wondered which important occasion today was. They had dinner and talked about unimportant things for awhile, that was when John knelt in front of his beloved and got the ring out of his pocket. He held Rose's; now frozen hand and looked up at her.

"Rose Tyler," he closed his eyes and took a deep breath, he opened his now beaming eyes and continued "…will you marry me?" Rose didn't think he would ask so soon but was ecstatic so she hugged him tight and whispered in his sensitive ears the answer he had been waiting for… "Yes. Of course!" John smiled and was proud he had pulled the evening off. Rose stared at the ring once it was on her slim finger and was captured by its beauty, "It's beautiful, and where did you get it?" John was delighted that she liked it and answered her "The Doctor…he plans everything nicely, doesn't he?" Rose looked up at her fiancé "Ya, he does… and I thank him for it."

"I love you; god knows I love you so very much." John was always trying to be polite and formal; Rose normally laughed at his formality and would tell him to loosen up but the way he said those words made her heart melt with satisfaction. "I love you too, I will always love you." They ended the event with a sweet chaste kiss and got home without letting go of each other's hands.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

The Doctor enjoyed having Jenny as his companion, he did miss having to explain everything to the pink and yellow humans but it was a nice change to have someone who understands most things without him having to explain, and the human's constant needs for sleep often left him bored, because he didn't need to sleep for as long as the humans did.

He had fun showing off to Jenny and Jenny had fun surprising the Doctor with tiny bits of knowledge, together they saved many planets and species.

The Doctor was always occupied which left him little time to think about his past companions and his human self, but when he did think about Rose or Donna or Martha or Sarah Jane, he always remembered the happy times. He trusted Jenny like a father should trust his daughter and he was…happy.

Hopefully he wouldn't be lonely anymore; now he has Jenny and his happy memories…

**Do not worry faithful readers! The story isn't finished yet, still a lot of drama to go! So keep reading and reviewing! Next chapter will probably be set in a few years after Rose and John's wedding! Stay tuned…**


	7. Fateful day

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas and editing the raw chapters.**

No one thought that day was unfortunate in anyway, especially not Rose and John…but they were wrong, so very wrong.

Actually it's the day the Doctor's human double had… died；

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

Rose knew she couldn't let John drive their new Mercedes alone, but she trusted him. John had developed a need for speed so they had chosen a car that was fast and could fit their growing family. Jonathan was born one year after their wedding and they had a perfect life.

Jonathan was so much like his father, with the same wise brown eyes and that heart-breaking smile. The only difference between the father and son was their hair color; Jonathan is blond, of course. And the fact that Jonathan was very fond of staying put, in the same place and found no trouble living in Cardiff and last but not least…absolutely _hated_ shopping.

Other then that, he is cheeky, loving and is extremely smart for a 1 year old, his knowledge exceeds the human mind of a 6-8 year old and beyond. He could already speak English fluently, so he naturally got sick of pretending he was a not yet educated little 'angel'; in public.

Jonathan liked building/creating/designing/making and… unfortunately, destroying/pulling apart things that were not as efficient as the things he had produced.

Also, liking the speed of cars and the accelerating rate of the engines; he got to sit in the shotgun…

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

The funeral was in a few months, and Rose was in pain all the time. She would clinch at her sides trying to hold herself together in front of her family; especially Jonathan. She would not smile but wouldn't grimace in pain at the sight of him, he looked so much like his father and Rose couldn't blame him. He is John's son after all.

But Jonathan was smart enough not to fall for his mother's facade like many others. Even his grandma Jackie had fallen for it. It hurt to think that the accident might have been his fault, and the fact that his father saved him and died in his place.

His mother would cry into her pillow every night when she thought he was asleep in his room. He sometimes stood outside the door of her room; silently, and cry with her for their loss.

No one thought it possible that John would die in an accident, but by doing what he did; saved his precious son.

He would dream of his father being alive and happy with his mother, dream of living together happily…without him. Without him as a burden, without him; his father should most likely be alive.

After the accident, Jonathan never talked again. Most people thought it normal for he was only a one year old. Many people would tell him crazy and hopeful things like; "Don't worry little guy, your daddy will be back, he is just having a vacation in heaven." Jonathan thought this stupid, but wished it were true.

He wished he never existed, he wishes his dad was still alive, he wishes his mum would stop crying, he wishes he could stop blaming himself.

But images from the crash would bring him to realize; it was _his_ fault his father never came home.

_Flashback:_

_John leaned in front of Jonathan to shelter him from the force of the collision and the glass from the windows. John successful shielded his son, but by taking all the force of the impact and the jagged glass…he smile a weak last smile at his son and said in a pained voice; "Don't worry, I'll be fine."_

**Sorry for the shortness, I have been rather…tired lately and I got camp in a few days. If you want; you could shout at me in a review! =D**


	8. The Ocean

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas**** and editing the raw chapters****.**

Rose realized her son was silent all the time, she was afraid he might have been too traumatized by his father's death that there is something wrong with him. She figured out that Jonathan had been silently crying outside her bedroom door when he should have been sleeping.

Rose would go to him, pick him up and cradle him to her chest like the toddler he is. He would cry himself to sleep, and when he was finally sound asleep, Rose would cry in pain. How could she have not known how much this affected Jonathan?

Was she that much of a horrible mother? Or was it the fact that she couldn't cope without John here? She would clutch her sides in pain at the mention or thought of his name. She would often go to sleep with Jonathan in her arms and dream;

Dream of John holding her and Jonathan, them chatting happily. One night she dreamed of him here, standing in the bedroom by the wardrobe saying something to her. The weird thing was; she couldn't hear a word he was saying and John was wearing a blue pin-stripe suit.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

After the painful ceremony that her husband was buried, for good. She thought she saw him standing by a tree in the shade, still wearing that blue pin-stripe suit. Rose told herself that she was hallucinating.

She shook off the feeling of being watched and picked up the tearful Jonathan and walked home.

Since the accident Rose or Jonathan have tried to avoid a ride in any car again, though sometimes they had too; little did they trust the vehicles.

xXxXxXxXxXxXxXx

It's been three months since John's funeral and Rose was still doing what she did before to keep herself from falling apart. She still had that dream, but every time was a little different. The mouth movements changed and she would some times hear scattered words.

Jonathan had these dreams too, while he was sleeping in his mother's arms. At first he thought it was just a dream, but the more he had the similar dream, the more words and background noise he could hear.

The most recent dream; one night ago, he had made out most of the words "Rose…g….to th…ay…I'm…re…aitin…rrry!"

He told his mum of this, and she would say "Don't worry Jonathan, it was just a dream." But while she said those words, her eyes flickered pain and longing. Jonathan was getting better and better at reading people's emotions.

One night, Jonathan hid a camera by the wardrobe and waited for his father to appear again, he just had to prove to his mum that something was going on. The same thing occurred, he appeared and said "Rose…g….to th…ay…I'm…re…aitin…rrry!"

The next day he secretly went on his mother's computer at work and used the software to filter the sounds. He filtered out the words the man was saying and listened to the background noise…he heard waves. The ocean!

**Please R&R! I need reviews! **


	9. Hallucinating

**Thank you thingythingthingda1 for helping me come up with ideas**** and editing the raw chapters****.**

Jonathan told Rose about his discover, but she didn't truly believe it till she saw the tape he had recorded.

When Rose was told about this, she was worried that Jonathan might be grieving his father too much to cause his to see hallucinations, but the tape he had recorded reminded Rose of the first time the Doctor had used the method to contact her.

Once Jonathan mentioned the word "Ocean", it all made wonderful sense then, Bad wolf bay, also known as Dalig Ulv Strandenin Norway.

Rose told Pete and Jackie, they went with her to visit the bay, in hope of seeing John or the Doctor.

**Sorry for the shortness…I PROMISE the next one will be longer! **


	10. Precious Time

**First Chapter of the big O NINE 09! Enjoy and REVIEW! ^^**

Just as Rose and Jonathan were getting the gear the might need for the trip to Norway. Rose spotted a Nike shoe box sitting in the corner of her wardrobe. This was weird; their family never bought Nike shoes, ever **(AN: No offence to the Nike people.)**. She pulled the lid away from the box and gasped. Inside held a picture of Jonathan sitting on John's shoulders while they both ate ice cream.

Rose remembered taking this picture. It was a Sunday and they went out to the harbour for a picnic. Rose's eyes teared up and she cried for a few minutes before coming up with the courage to look at the rest of the things in the box. She realized that it was empty apart from and envelope and a crystal like thing.

She saw that the letter was addressed to her. She opened it up;

_To my dearest Rose,_

_When you read this letter, it must mean something has happened to me and I can not tell you about the contents of this box. The crystal like thing you might be holding is a piece of the Tardis._

_This was given to me by the Doctor before he left us in Norway. I didn't want to tell about this because it may bring up bad memories and make you unhappy. _

_There was a way to make this piece of the Tardis grow. But it needed some sort of energy from Gallifrey to feed on. It would have taken twenty years of my life, but I was too selfish to give up that precious amount of time._

_With the help of our darling son Jonathan, you might be able to find a way to make this grow. _

_I just want you to know, no matter what happened to me. I am peaceful, because I have loved a wonderful woman who in return, loved me back and had an amazing son. Know that I love you both and always will._

_Love, John_

Rose couldn't stop the loud cries coming up her throat. She clutched the letter tightly to her chest and sobbed. She hadn't realized her son's presence till he picked up the shoe box and glanced inside. Rose was silent as she handed the piece of the Tardis and the letter to her only child.

He read the letter as tears formed in his beautiful brown eyes. When he had finished reading, he folded the letter and put it back in the box. Jonathan held the crystal like thing and examined it while he thought about making it work. The mother and son both heard a sound, which Rose recognized as the engine of the Tardis.

_~TARDIS~_

"I think we landed alright." He scratched his head.

She glared at him "Ahuh? Maybe you should let _me_ drive next time."

He actually shrinked back at her fierceness and pouted "But only I have a licence!"

"Oh really? Well, where is it? Show me." She put a hand out while the other rested on her hip.

"Erm…okay, I may have _had_ one…" he rocked back and forth on his heels and examined his toes.

"What happened to it?"

The two were interrupted by a confused child crying out; "Daddy?"

**Cliffy? =D**

**John wrote the letter, in case he wasn't there to tell Rose or Jonathan about what the Doctor gave him. Also…it's still the 10****th**** Doctor David Tennant, he hasn't regenerated…yet.**


	11. Daddy

_Previously: ~TARDIS~_

"_I think we landed alright." He scratched his head._

_She glared at him "Ahuh? Maybe you should let me drive next time."_

_He actually shrinked back at her fierceness and pouted "But only I have a license!"_

"_Oh really? Well, where is it? Show me." She put a hand out demandingly while the other rested on her hip._

"_Erm…okay, I may have had one…" he rocked back and forth on his heels uncomfortably and examined his toes._

"_What happened to it?"_

_The two were interrupted by a confused child crying out; "Daddy?"_

**Chapter 10 – Daddy.**

Jenny and the Doctor both turned around， each with one of their eyebrow raised.

They looked at the direction from where the sound of the word came from, and came face to face with a blonde boy and familiar brown eyes.

"What?" they said in unison.

Jenny looked at the Doctor in pure confusion "Dad, that boy just called you daddy."

"I know that. I don't think I had a son with blonde hair before…" answered the Doctor.

"Okay? Um…where and when are we?"

"Good question." The Doctor turned around to face the blonde boy. "Hello. I'm the Doctor. What's your name?" he held out a hand to the boy, waiting for him to shake it. Instead the boy started crying and ran towards the Doctor, tightly hugging his leg.

The Doctor shrugged at Jenny and mumbled "Oh well, I'd hug anyone." and returned the hug. "Don't cry…um…"

"Jonathan, my name is Jonathan. And you must be _the_ Doctor. You look so much like my daddy." The blonde boy said.

_He didn't speak like a toddler at all, his speech is too fluent_. Thought the Doctor. Then he was attacked again.

This time by a young blonde woman whom he recognized as Rose. She was standing behind him and was quiet the whole time he's been here, but suddenly pounced on him and the Doctor found himself in a bear hug.

He stumbled backwards. Although he was totally stunned, he hugged Rose back none the less. All awkwardness from the beach forgotten for the moment.

They finally let go of each other. "We must be in Pete's world." He whispered softly and turned to his daughter. "Jenny? You remember me telling you about Pete's world, don't you?"

"Yes, I'm Jenny; his daughter, and you must be the famous Rose Tyler. Dad won't stop talking about you." The Doctor blushed and turned his attention to rolling on the heels of his feet.

"So! Where's ole John Smith?" the Doctor asked with a smirk. Tears fell from Rose's eyes just as Jonathan wiped his and ran to his Mother.

"Daddy's gone."

Those two words were like the two missing pieces of a puzzle that fitted into the Doctor's lack of knowledge.

"Oh, Rose. You, John and Jonathan." The knowledge hit him like running into a wall. He wanted Rose to be happy and have a normal life, but knowing she loves another man hurt him…_a lot_.

**AN: Sorry for not updating sooner. Got held up and forgot I had written this. ^^**


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